day 30

i have done it...
and i don't believe
i have anything
left to say...

not today,
anyway.

poetry thursday, on the 29th day...

really,
this is not desperate
last minute posting, really, it's not...
even though it is quarter to ten
and greys anatomy is on in 15 minutes
and it is supposed to be the conclusion to last week's cliffhanger
even though the television guide is saying it's a repeat
this is not a quickie...
there is thought, there is meaning...

and so instead i offer
my very first poetry thursday featuring my own words...

now, bring on friday.

day 28 and i'm here..i am...i'm here

5 fast but really good things on a wednesday...

-the reconnection with an old friend and reinstating of jokes
that are funny to no one else but us...and to being called "spiraljack"again.

-tickle/wrestle fights on the couch

-shrek the halls is coming on at nine...bring on the christmas specials!


-the huge white mugs my father in law gave us...i wish i could show you
the mugs he gave us last time...t-ack-y...but these, these, i love...


-quiet, relatively stress-less day at work...with hot chocolate...and a box of chocolates....
and noooooo customers...sigh....bliss.

go here. share five. do it. do it now.

SPC (what i wear...week four)

in the spirit of christmas...

i wear the grinch.

please don't ask
why his face is white
and not green...
i was ...
ahem
under the influence
of alcohol
when getting said tattoo
( i know i know i should have been sober
but i don't have a pain tolerance...
at all)
and didn't notice until after the fact
and just never got it fixed.

check into more spc'ers here!

a nablopomo tag on the 26th day

i was tagged by this wannabe cowgirl
to do a nablopomo meme...
the rules:
link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog.
share 7 random and or weird things about yourself.
tag 7 random people participating in nablopomo at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

so here goes:

• when i was pregnant for both my kids, i craved the smell of permanent markers and exhaust fumes....paired with ice....i had a marker that was put away and every now and then i would allow myself one small whiff...if we were stopped at a red light, i lower my window just a bit for the exhaust fumes. bizarre but true.
• i make a game out of everything...chopping potatoes, doing dishes, etc...any job that is repetitive...and no one knows i am doing it...thankfully.
• i totally overuse this type of punctuation... and can't stop myself...
• i have a vein that pops out on my forehead when i am upset or mad...
• i eat a bag (big bag) of mike and ikes every day.
• my arms are very crooked. to the point of grossing people out.
  
• i crack my neck by grabbing the back of my head by my hair and twisting until my neck cracks. this also grosses people out.

Tada!

and now i tag (totallyoptionalofcourse!)
daisies :)
jamie :)
deb :)
krista :)
the world's greatest mommy :)
estea b. :)
vanessa :)

and anyone else who would like to play.
i heart mondays.

scrap of a sunday

i spent my sunday
sweeping up dust bunnies
and hobbe's fur balls
from corners and nooks...
i dyed my hair
with decidedly more brown
than red this time,
and like it...
i have cleaned and decluttered,
eaten toasted tomato sandwiches and
drank glass after glass of
cold diet coke...

now we are going to see my mom and dad
and then come home in time
to cuddle up in a four person giggling pile
on a couch that seats 2
to watch america's funniest home videos...

that's my scrap of a sunday.

barely made it...

this is what napoblomo
has reduced me to...
posting random pictures
at 10:35 at night.

friday..i'm in love...

• these adorable little books...
• look at her hair...i love her mom's blog, too...but would you look at her hair! :)
• this song...the video? not so much. and the fact that eight loves to sing part of it.
• that twelve can play 1/2 a full song on her clarinet...yay twelve!
• reading this
• anticipation of this and this and this but especially this....
• the never ending inspiration of this well known widely loved blog...
  

fragments and remnants on a poetry thursday...

and who are you
are you
unapproachable?
unassailable
spouting
disjointed
explanations
where
none
are needed
while the
motorcycles
rumble
in the background
and
sweat
beads
on the back of your neck
and
paper confetti falls
from
the sky...

i have been
silent
now for seven
hours
drinking hot
chocolate
in the sun
with the
smell of
wild roses
behind me
and dying of
thirst.

5 really good things on a wednesday...

this...even with crazy hair...

this...

and this...

makes a new "me" area and
a new "him" toy

all just added bonuses...

now, go see liz...give her your five...

SPC (what i wear...week three)

i don't wear a lot of jewelry...
but what i do wear
i tend to wear
constantly.

my engagement ring
is the simplest, smallest ring
we could find,
my choice.
my band, just a band...
i wear one other ring
which was given to my mom
by my dad...
that's it and that's all.

i never take them off
and i twist them all the time
out of habit.

i wear one necklace...
it was a hemp one but i wore it til it fell apart
then i switched for one with a wooden fish on it
but recently
switched to the magnetic
ugly-but-if-it-will-give-me-relief-
from-headaches-i-don't-care-
(even-if-it-is-only-in-my-head)
necklace...
and i fidget with the heart on it
constantly.

he gave me magnetic earrings, too but
i think i will pass on that.
heh.

edited to add...go here for more self portraits!

wow.

it is day nineteen of nablopomo
and today, it is kicking my butt...

we bought the new tv
as mentioned in previous post...
and it didn't work...
but we didn't know that until
about two hours into tearing the living room apart
because the new tv would look so much better
in the other corner
which meant the hutch had to move,
which meant the old tv/game cube area
had to be moved
which meant i had to clean out the closet under the stairs
which meant that i
spent
my whole
day off
rearranging...

it is 8:40 pm.
and i'm ready for bed.

sunday...day 18

i'm tired and
the house is messy
and the trunk is full of christmas presents...
the laundry is not done
and there is school tomorrow
and eight sooooo needs a bath...
dishes in the sink,
hole in my sock,
pajama pants ripped in two places.
happy kids eating candy on the couch,
floor not swept,
warm house,
happy husband with a 42" inch tv to set up...

give and take.

saturday snippets

i was tagged recently by wendy...
and i was surprised
at how difficult this was for me to define.

the question is this...
"try to think of three things that I feel good writing should be"

i can't define what good writing is for everyone
but i can tell you what draws me in, what makes me stay...

lyrical yet concise
wordy but sparse
flow

i don't know if this is too vague,
yet this is truly how i feel...
i go for the punches,
i think in clipped phrases...
i read aloud in my head to a staccato beat.

i don't like things that are too obvious,
too drawn out, descriptive, verbose and heavy with importance...
i like quicksilver writing with a stab of sentence
hitting it's intended mark.

does this makes sense?
or is this napoblomo making me sound like i have lost my mind...
posting every day?
what the hell was i thinking.

i would be curious to see what you say,
what your 3 indicators are...
wherein i will slap my forehead
and wonder
why didn't i think of that!

a spritely friday i'm in love...with a lemon lime twist

because this post drew me
to remembering how much
i love
this song,
i am dedicating today's friday-i'm-in-love
to music...

music-i-forgot-i-loved...


the skydiggers....


radiohead...


grapes of wrath...


grapes of wrath again, which i loved even more than first one....


blue rodeo...guilty of singing this at top of my lungs


leonard cohen....my absolute most favorite song ever...seriously...ever.
you can ask my university roommates...who grew to hate my constant replay
of it...

so many more that i could add
but don't want to make it too long to read...
and i find it strange and odd but in a good way
that i never intend to choose to love canadian bands...
but...it just happens...
as with books, too...
i am drawn to them.

poetry thursday...with lyrics

because it speaks to me...
which is what i want poetry
to do...

When you were here before,
Couldn't look you in the eye,
You're just like an angel,
Your skin makes me cry;

You float like a feather,
In a beautiful world,
I wish I was special,
You're so f**kin' special;

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo,
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here;

I don't care if it hurts,
I wanna have control,
I want a perfect body,
I want a perfect soul;

I want you to notice,
When I'm not around,
You're so f**kin' special,


I wish I was special;

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo,
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here, ohhhh, ohhhh

She's running out again,
She's running,
She runs runs runs runs...
Runs...

Whatever makes you happy,
Whatever you want,
You're so f**king special,
I wish I was special;

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo,
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here,

I don't belong here...

music provided by:

radiohead
sudden memory of a song i had forgotten how much i love provided by:
this hardcore and amazing blogger

what song speaks to you?

5 really good things on a wednesday...

still loving this idea from liz elayne...

give it a shot...you'll like it...

5 really good things...

mail that came that
doesn't say yes, but means that door is not shut...
(sorry for being cryptic, but i don't want to jinx it...)

buttered toast with brown sugar for breakfast

an unbelievably blue sky

12 so happy with new boots...
8 so happy with a new pair of gloves...
that it takes so little to satisfy them...

all the new blog people i have met
through SPC...
why did i not do this a long time ago!

now go.
find five.

SPC (what i wear...week two)

i wear docs.

i bought my first pair about 14 years ago...
8 hole and black.
i wore them with baby doll dresses.
i wore them with frayed jeans.
i wore them with my mcdonald's uniform.
i wore them in mosh pits and climbing
forbidden scaffolding outside of churches.
i wore them on first dates.
i wore them on the last ones, too.


my husband bought me my second pair of docs
in burgandy, also 8 hole...
i wore them with maternity clothes.
i wore them at the bookstore i worked at
which is why the toe of one is so much more scuffed
than the other, because i constantly knelt on one knee.
i wore them on my kid's first day of school
and to my daughter's graduation from grade six.
i wore them when i started my first day of school
for early childhood education.


i bought my third pair from a customer at the bookstore.
he asked me if i wore docs all the time,
(which people asked me regularly)...
when i said yes,
he offered to sell me a pair that he had bought
for his girlfriend
while he was on a trip to montreal
only to find out when he got home
that she
had cheated on him.
he sold me the 350.00 boots
for
fifty dollars.
i wear these boots with cords and
baby doll dresses layered over frayed jeans.
i wear them with business skirts and conservative
sweaters.
i wear them to work and to the kid's dentist appointments.
i wear them while taking pictures
and i was wearing them the day i got my driver's license
at 37.

i wear docs.

see what others are wearing...

monday makes...

i'm a sick, sick person.
i know this because
i have decided that i cannot make all of the things
that i want to make
for christmas...
so i have started planning
for next year's christmas
today....

i know i am sick....
just go with it.

so with that in mind:

this is too cute....
mittens....
gah....i'm overloading on cute.
i could spend alot of money here....
there is a new baby coming at christmas, maybe this?
is it too early for the tree?

and then, in reality...
here is where i am...
still knitting this...maybe 10 rows more than what i had last monday.
damn headache.
gah.

remembrance day

today
eight rushed to get his army men
out the kitchen
in time to line them up
in salute
while Oh Canada played on the radio.

then he remained quiet and still
through the two minutes of radio silence...

before taking the troops with him
to line up on the couch
to pay tribute
with him
as he watched the ceremonies
on television.

he's a funny boy, that eight.

saturday snippets

after a 3 day headache from hell,
i am back.
rejuvenated and ready to roll.

i am sick of three day headaches...so i called the guy who sells
magnetic pain relief in the form of jewelry,
a necklace in my case...
and i am normally too cynical for stuff like this,
but damn it,
i want it to work...
i want to feel better.

so i'm trying it.

and that is pretty much my saturday snippet.
i am currently headache-free,
spent an evening watching "meet the robinsons"
followed by how the grinch stole christmas
while twelve made sugar cookies for the first time
all by herself....

i hate being sick,
but i love feeling better.

postponed.

don't know if there will be a friday i'm in love
as i am
holding onto remnants of a two day headache...

but i'm posting,
damn it,
i'm posting.

gah.
where is the advil.

poetry thursday revisited...

i consider the fact of meeting you here +
considering the idea that i will probably
look as strange & weird to you
tonight
as i did then, in high school
sitting at a table alone
mp3 player replacing the walkman
cappuccino in exchange of pop
but ever present notebook
ever present scribbler that i am
silent and unaware
only one thing changed-now i don't care.

5 really good things on a wednesday...

liz elayne has a dare on her blog...
a dare to find 5 really good things to blog about.

this came at perfect time for me
because i have been searching for something
for wednesdays,
especially for this blog-posting-full month
of nablopomo-november...
so i have adopted
(with liz's permission, of course)
her dare and
taken it
a step further...
i vow to do this every wednesday
for at least the month of november...

this goes well with my journal exercise
that i "borrowed" from michelle borrowed from this book....
every morning
i have been journaling what i really really want.
and every evening, that happiest thing that happened that day...
and i think
i will use this exercise as resource for wednesdays...

oh
it's all coming together now!
thanks to friends.

so.
5 really good things on a wednesday...
1. twelve's fantastic report card..90% average, 98% in science! wow.

2. salt and pepper chicken wings

3. an email from a best friend telling me i am truly her best friend

4. evan almighty...sooooo funny.

5. planning for christmas...i heart christmas...

and you, why don't you pop over to liz's and take her dare...
i think she is making tea...and i'm pretty sure she is wearing the
cutest little mary jane slipper socks that you have ever seen.

my first ever self portrait challenge...

there is something about sesame street
that
gets me...
that calls to me with it's siren song
of banter between ernie and bert...
it's ladybug picnics,
it's pinball counting.

i watched sesame street far longer than the average kid should.
i blamed it on no cable access,
but really, i would have watched regardless.
i cried for real when mr hooper died.
i taped maria and luis's wedding...
i never really cared for all new characters (elmo)
but baby bear...
oh..
i love baby bear.

i feel guilty when i pick favorites...
(although ernie and bert hold a strong place)
but what about super grover...
oscar? grungetta? the count? forgetful jones?
big bird! snuffleupagus? THE TWEEDLEBUGS!
sam the robot?
sherlock hemlock! guy smiley? slimey?
telly and his triangles and all his anxieties i so associate with?
sully and biff?

i can't choose.

when i went to university, i was 21.
i pasted huge pictures of sesame street characters
on my dorm room wall...
they were my comfort zone,
those guys are always there for me...
collectively,
they get me.

now i wear them
via a collection of t-shirts...
and they make me happy.
they make me
ME.

1-2-3-4-5
6-7-8-9-10-
11-12
dododododododo dodo dodo dododoooo!
TWELVE!

more self portraits here!

monday makes...

on the needles...
trying to make this:

found in this sweet book...

Other inspirations:
this amazing artist featured in the Oct/Nov MEHC...
a newfound blog that i have fallen in love with...
the sweetest l'il candy house...
these adorable dolls...
i have fallen for the dollhouse in this picture from soulemama, i want to live in one!

day 4 and i'm still standin'

what do i really really want? i really really want more days like today...

days in which we find the hurricane has passed us over in favor of
becoming a post tropical storm...

days in which we sleep in, and then have a little early morning fun
that requires keeping the bedroom door locked
for just a bit and muffling all sound...

breakfasts of maple flavored bacon and crispy crunchy potatoes...

a nap on the couch tucked in my S on one side
and 12's supremely soft blanketon the other, bare toes smooshed
into orange and pink stripey softness...

kids playing happily together upstairs for at least an hour and half
before arguing...

supper at my mom and dad's,
giggling at my dad's latest attempt at leaving a phone message
on his answering machine which turned out unbelievably robotic...

then the four of us crunched up on one couch
laughing hysterically as *28 people get
bonked with a ball before the wiener dog fits through the fence...

sweet kisses before bed.

(*america's funniest home videos, of course...heh)

breakdown of my saturday...in point form...

• i didn't do so great on a test that i really really wanted to do well on.
• eight doused himself in horrible cologne.
• a sweater i had been wanting finally went on sale today
• i backed into a ditch.
• i bought flashlights that also glow in the dark in preparation for tonight's possible hurricane.
• i got the car out of the ditch ALL BY MYSELF...and it was dark...and raining...
• we are having salt and pepper chicken wings in 15 minutes.
• we watched evan almighty last night and it was hysterical.
• i didn't get to knit today
• but i did buy a new book
• and i have tomorrow and monday off
• lastly...i blogged today...day 3....go, me!
  

a new month, a new plan, stan.

November.

Here it is.

and with the brisk arrival of november

i have decided to undertake a few blog projects.
one is nablopomo...national blog post month...
i considered it last year,
but this year...i'm doing it.

and i am pairing that with a journaling exercise
that michelle suggested from Eat, Pray, Love...

1. keep a journal and every morning ask yourself what you really, really want
2. everyday record your happiest moment of the day
3. refine your mantra because what you're saying to yourself over and over again everyday has power

so here is today's "FRIDAY-I'M-IN-LOVE" with:

-chocolate poptarts
-chunky yummy dark brown yarn
-the winding down of the month of halloween
-new prospects and possibilities that could me oodles of more time
-coming home to eight on the couch watching tv...who said
"mom, did you know that a barrel of oil is 3.00 now and last year it
was only 2.35!"
-twelve having friends over to get ready for a junior high dance

shudder....

can someone please tell me
where the hell
this kid's head is?

i swear i did not alter this picture at all.
i'm sure it is just my eye's tricking me...
but no matter how i look at it,
I CAN'T FIND HIS HEAD.

ps. click photo to make it larger...