december views {1}

the first day of december views...
my third year playing along...
i look forward to this chance for silence
after a month of constant-coming-to-the-page.

today i feel stormy and sad
and dark and restless...

a wake today, a funeral tomorrow
a family disagreement getting
blown a little out of control...
looking back to see what i posted
for december views last year
and coming across this...
as i practice the readings for
tomorrow's funeral
i am suddenly brought back to
him and how i forget sometimes
that he won't be there tomorrow...
he's not there to make the
inappropriate jokes
and take the tension away
with his raspy laugh and his booming voice.

and it makes me remember that
this is what life is about...
putting ourselves out there,
wearing our hearts on our sleeve...
even though the danger of loss is great
the reward of knowing someone is greater...
of knowing their quirks, loving their oddities,
accepting their faults,
forgiving their good intentions when
they collide with your own.