birthday boy...

nine years ago today.
how can that be?
i still find it hard to leave you...
i am always reminded of you
standing at the baby gate
with those heartbreaking big brown eyes
babbling "hababubuh buh?"
when i would be leaving for work
and it would take every ounce of
resistance in me
not to turn around
and come back
and pick you up
and breathe you in.

you are my cuddler,
my worrier,
my thoughtful and concerned.
you make me giggle out loud,
you are my bighead,
my boy,
my baby still, even at nine.