Tuesday, June 22, 2010

loud silence

the words that i long to say
just won't roll off my tongue...
instead
they stick like glue
and my heart hurts
because the words that did
come out
feel jagged and sharp and bitter
like bile
and i've hurt you and i've hurt you
my little girl,
my grown up too fast first child...
and i don't know what to say to you
anymore
i don't know how to make it better
when none of my old words will work...
my old words clash against your fragile butterfly wing feelings
they shatter, they smash, they crash to the floor.

and i hear your music come on
as i stand on the other side of your door...

6 comments:

Char said...

((hugs))

Nat said...

Oh I hope one day she realizes how much you love her... she sounds a lot like me.

Hugs to you my dear..

Christina said...

Oh god, I hear this and my little guy is only 5 still and already there are days like this...

Jakki said...

hugs...its such a hard decision to open the door, try and talk it out or just let things be for a different/better time...

twitches said...

This is sad, but lovely. We are all only human, and so we can all relate to this feeling.

Relyn said...

Oh, this makes me ache for you both. Just love her, Momma. Love her any way you know how.