Thursday, January 18, 2007

poetry thursday (building on a line)

my line from dazey rosie for poetry thursday...
"and then i cycled away."


there she sat on the side
of the road
bags in hand
fingers numb from the cold
i asked her
her name
she said lies shouldn't be told
(like ropes that bind,
they also fray)

i passed her the time
and then
i cycled away.

9 comments:

wendy said...

i used you....and not in a good way, I fear....

R's Musings said...

Sweet poem. Thanks for stopping by. I couldn't think of a title, then I looked to see if there were more lines, and there it was...yours. Thanks! -Robin

Poet with a Day Job said...

I adore this poem, especially that final rhyme....so, so good, a perfect nugget of a poem.

la vie en rose said...

awesome! i love it!

twilightspider said...

This feels so effortless - like it just rhymes accidentally - something I can never do. I love your parenthetical lines - so true.

ecm said...

i liked the way this captured a small moment...and the last line "i cycled away" seemed perfect, especially with the lowercase i

blackdaisies said...

oh oh ~ so totally loved it :)

G said...

I love this too. It's simply perfect.

wendy said...

I love "I passed her the time"

Very good!