wordless wednesday

no poem today...instead i am random and inconcise...

easter is over
the long weekend done
back to work in the morning...

i am happy and quiet and full of solitude tonight
and tangible silence
{but wordy in my own head}
{if that makes sense}

{i feel like posting but i don't feel like talking}

i spent the day today just hanging with my 15 year old
bright and shiny girl...talking and napping and
giggling and sharing...and it was good.

the laundry didn't get done
and neither did the dishes
but i wouldn't have traded this afternoon
for any amount of money...

these small moments of
imperfect and unexpected connections...
these are the moments
that i guard and i steal and i hoard
like tiny bits of sweet sunshine
for the days that feel like the rain
will
never
ever
go
away
and i will never be warm again...

and then she surprises me
by leaning in close,
by lingering after supper to share stories,
by tickling and crawling into the bed
between her dad and me
to watch silly chocadooby videos on his iphone...

and i'm warm and happy and basking in her sunshine smile.

Disbelief...

I did it.

I finally
actually
really
effing
did
it.

I
stood
up there
in front of a mic
in front of other people
in front of other writers
and
I read something
of
my
own.

out loud.

and it was so much fucking harder than i ever thought it would be.

but
I did it

and someday
I might even do it again

(and the best part?
that when I finished reading my first piece
a woman in the audience
called out
"more! more!")

Something of my own on a cold stormy spring night....

the stars and planets
they collide
in the midst of their organized
hullabaloo
i stand alone
i wait for you
security stolen
alone
bereft
i stand alone
i wait for you...
and when you see me
i light up like the sun.

a favorite poem...

a long time ago
i read a poem on liz elayne's blog
that has stuck with me 
ever since.
the poet is thomas lux...

The People of the Other Village

hate the people of this village   

and would nail our hats

to our heads for refusing in their presence to remove them

or staple our hands to our foreheads   

for refusing to salute them

if we did not hurt them first: mail them packages of rats,

mix their flour at night with broken glass.

We do this, they do that.

They peel the larynx from one of our brothers’ throats.

We devein one of their sisters.

The quicksand pits they built were good.

Our amputation teams were better.

We trained some birds to steal their wheat.

They sent to us exploding ambassadors of peace.

They do this, we do that.

We canceled our sheep imports.   

They no longer bought our blankets.   

We mocked their greatest poet   

and when that had no effect   

we parodied the way they dance

which did cause pain, so they, in turn, said our God

was leprous, hairless.

We do this, they do that.

Ten thousand (10,000) years, ten thousand

(10,000) brutal, beautiful years.

i'm not sure what it is about this poem that draws me in...

the brutal beautiful language, 

the short succinct sentences...

the haunting truth...

but i know it stuck with me

and that's when i know i love a poem...

when years later

i remember having read it

and go on a mad search trying to find it....

what about you?

have a favorite poem...

please share...

i'd love to hear it...

april 11 already...

here it is
already the 11th of april...
and i feel that
although
i have not been here as much i had hoped
i have been crossing things off my poetry month plan...

i did put a poem on the fridge...i had a feeling when i wrote that
on my list
that it would be something by ee cummings...
i have always been in love with this poem...
i'm curious what the kids will say when they come home
{if they notice it all}
and depending on their reaction
i may add more

but even if they don't react
i like to be able to read it in my head while i'm searching
for the milk

poems in music and music in poems...

when i was a kid
i was obsessed with song lyrics...
i would pore over the lyrics from every record liner
{prince 1999}{rick springfield}{micheal jackson}
{ratt}{motley crue}
and read and reread the lyrics from my cassette tapes
{bon jovi}{billy idol}{madonna}{more prince}
until they fell apart from use and abuse....

i would copy the lyrics over and over...i would cover my school notebooks
with snippets of songs and broken bits of favorite phrases...

this became a favorite song when i was little older...university actually...
but i fell in love with its words...with its angst...

to me, it was the perfect love song...

When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so fucking special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell I'm doing here?
I don't belong here

She's running out the door
She's running out
She runs runs runs

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here

Poems and poetry and words and rhythm...

i am behind...but still want to play...
i completely forgot that april is national poetry month...
other years i have done napowrimo
and written/posted a poem a day (or at least gave it my best shot)
but this year
i want to do something different.

instead i have made up a list for myself
a list of 30 ways that i can fit poetry into my month of april
some were my own ideas but others were borrowed from here and here...
{lots of amazing ideas that could carry you through many months of poetry}

but here is my list for April...{not expecting to do specifically in this order}

1.  read a poem out loud
2. put a poem on the fridge {done april 11/11}
3. write out the song lyrics to a song i like  {done april 5/11}
4. pick a photo and write a poem
5. write a poem about your lunch
6. go to a poetry reading  {done april 7/11}
7. leave a poem in a random place
8. memorize a poem
9. illustrate a poem
10. listen to a poet read their own poetry (audio/podcast/youtube) {done...ee cummings..}
11. put a poem in a letter {and mail it}
12. put a poem on the pavement in chalk
13. sign up for a poetry class or workshop
14. April 14 is Poem-in-a-Pocket day...carry a poem in your pocket, share it if you like...
15. look for poetry apps for the ipad
16. leave a poem in odd, random places in the house for the kids to find
17. read a book of poetry outside, in your car, in the bathtub, walking down the sidewalk
18. go to a bookstore and just look at random poetry books {done april 7th...indigo}
19. invite people to trade their favorite poems by mail
20. write a poem using unexpected materials
21. read poetry makers-interviews with writers of children's poetry
22. start a poetry journal
23. read "how to read a poem"
24. turn a shopping list or to do list into a poem
25. get a poetry recommendation from someone else...read it with an open mind
26. make a list of your most loved poems
27. read up on poetic forms
28. visit an art museum for poetic inspiration
29. write a letter to a favorite poet
30. create and share a list of poetry ideas for the month of april..........DO THE LIST.

i would love it if you played along...share your list, share your poems...put yourself out of your comfort zone...